| 0:00 |
| what's up y'all welcome back to another episode of the Owens recovery science podcast this is our 2023 Memorial Day |
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| episode where we step back and don't talk bfr but we dedicate this podcast to |
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| service members who have paid the ultimate sacrifice and and died in |
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| combat and service for our country if if you didn't know that's actually the |
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| meaning that's the purpose of Memorial Day is to have a national holiday to |
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| remember those individuals that died serving our country and so we wanted to do our part to make |
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| sure that many of those soldiers that have died are not forgotten and so we invite |
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| people on the podcast to come tell their story so that we can |
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| remember and learn who they were what they did |
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| who they've left behind and kind of say thank you if you will |
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| this year all although we've alluded to it another previous Memorial Day episodes we wanted |
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| to try to put more of a focus on the mental health side of |
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| combat of serving our country of leaving the military and the structure that it |
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| provides and those sorts of things if you didn't know |
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| the suicide rate among veterans and active service members is five times greater than that of the general U.S |
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| population in fact since we started tracking veteran and active member suicide since |
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| 2001 what we've learned is that on every year |
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| on average about 6 000 service members or veterans commit suicide |
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| that's over a hundred and twenty thousand veterans and service members in the last |
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| 20 years that's a big number it's something that has hit a little too |
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| close to home for us that owns recovery science this year in a few different ways and not something that we're |
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| unfamiliar with but has maybe come a little closer then |
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| other times perhaps and so we wanted to just kind of tackle this head-on and |
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| talk about it provide you with some resources if you |
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| are unfamiliar and you know try to just do what we can |
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| to reduce I guess the stigma around mental health issues that potentially |
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| lead to suicide the good news is |
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| from a government perspective from a Department of Defense perspective from a |
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| VA perspective our leaders are very aware that this is a problem and they |
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| have dedicated resources in the form of money and jobs and programs and effort |
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| to try to help stop this but like the va's 43-page document that |
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| they published earlier this year on veteran suicide |
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| everyone can play a role in this if it's just the function of |
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| knowing that some of these resources are available and being able to connect someone |
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| or maybe plan more of an active role or donating money there's there's lots of |
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| options and ways that you and I can just try to help make a little bit of |
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| change for the good here and so I've put together a number of different resources |
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| in our show notes for you from just general groups within the U.S that are |
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| focused on mental health and mental awareness if you didn't know may is mental awareness month has been since |
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| 1949. and you know that's something I had no clue of and it's literally been that way |
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| in my whole life so there are groups that are just kind of year round always |
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| trying to provide services to people that need it from a number of different |
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| mental health perspectives and then there are groups that are within the military and or specifically for |
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| veterans that provide resources to those individuals |
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| to help them address whatever mental health complications they they might be |
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| having and so I think you know a minimum if if you and I just kind of know that |
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| these groups and programs are available and and how to connect with them then |
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| that's a win and so one of those resources hopefully can be our show notes for you so |
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| um that's about all I wanted to say on that I you know there's a lot of stats and things you get through at this and talk |
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| about but you know that I think the the big thing from my perspective and and I |
| 5:21 |
| think I speak for all of Owens recovery science when I say this is that a it's |
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| important that we know that there's a problem B it's important that we know that there are some resources available to people and and we can try to help |
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| Point folks in the right direction so without delaying any longer I'm gonna |
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| turn this over to Johnny he interviews a gentleman named Ryan Keough who is a |
| 5:47 |
| former Army Ranger Johnny got to know him through his time at center for the Intrepid and Ryan does |
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| a fantastic job in this episode of talking about the ways that he coped with leaving the |
| 6:01 |
| military that transitioned kind of out of the military and then also with how he approaches |
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| Memorial Day which was really really cool to hear honestly and he memorializes a good friend of theirs |
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| named Joe kapocheski who just recently committed suicide and we'll have some |
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| links to Joe's book and a video about some of the things Joe did while while |
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| he was in the service as a way of of remembering him and then as we typically |
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| do we'll play we'll play Taps at the end so hang around for that if you would and just kind of |
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| maybe say I don't know a little prayer or whatever you like to do for |
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| putting some good out in the world all right here's Johnny this is the Owens recovery science |
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| podcast [Music] |
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| all right welcome back to a special home recovery science podcast this is Johnny |
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| Owens here and I've got Kyle Kimbrough here running the Wheels of Steel in the background |
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| um and you know we do this I think this is our third year right Kyle of of doing a Memorial Day broadcast so this is um |
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| something that is very near and dear to our hearts this is a holiday that that |
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| we take very seriously in a time to reflect and that's Memorial Day and then not only to to reflect on |
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| those of the past in in the wars and and after the wars but also just some of the |
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| stories from from some amazing people as well and so today I have an amazing person on the podcast he's a he's a |
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| great friend of mine we became friends when when he spent time at the center for the Intrepid |
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| um I was his therapist so I got to to really pick on him a ton but |
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| we became friends uh like I did with so many of the folks there and along with his family so I love this this guy he's |
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| got an amazing family he punched way above his weight when he married his wife I mean uh yeah that is that is |
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| about it the truest statement yeah we always did to your Christmas card and my daughters are like oh my God they are so |
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| pretty about your daughters and your wife yeah thankfully my all my daughters look just like my wife so yeah no it's |
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| good that's good you know I I try to I try to provide at least a little bit there but you know thankfully the strong |
| 8:28 |
| genes came from that side so I think the first person this card I got for you I text you uh who's the dad |
| 8:35 |
| hey look there's you know I've regularly out kicked my coverage in |
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| most of my life and I continued I have as well man I have as well luckily we have weak genes the lady jeans take it |
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| over um but his name's Ryan Keough I'm gonna I'm gonna read your your bio directly |
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| just because there's there's more things in here than I'll bring remember but um he's from Caldwell Idaho he's a Boise |
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| State freaking fan I remember that with that stupid Blue Field they have over there I was always trying to understand |
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| what was going on over there but um he went to West Point and graduated |
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| obviously from from the academy there and joined the army Ryan served in the conventional Army as an infantry officer |
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| um leading in a platoon of soldiers during a year-long deployment in Northeast Afghanistan Afghanistan before being selected to serve in the US Army's |
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| Elite 75th Ranger regiment down there at Fort Benning in Georgia he's still down in the Atlanta area now while serving in |
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| third ranger battalion 75th regiment Ryan completed multiple deployments in the support of the global war on |
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| terrories of terrorism as well as a ranger Russell platoon leader and Ranger operations officer so after more than |
| 9:46 |
| eight years on active duty including three deployments Ryan retired from the Army after losing his right leg below |
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| the knee um he's he's reserved he's received more Awards and than we could probably count in decoration including the Bronze Star |
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| Purple Heart combat infantry badge and the ranger Tab and now he's he's trying |
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| to rule the world in the private Equity world so he's he joined the corporate Workforce in 2013. |
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| um he worked for one of the largest avocado producers and mango growers in the world um he completed his MBA from Emory |
| 10:17 |
| University and now he is with this private Equity Group and again taking over the world he's got beautiful kids |
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| like I mentioned earlier three daughters so he's got it worse than I do because I'm just dealing with two daughters but |
| 10:29 |
| I've got the high school thing going on so um just wait dude just wait it's gonna get tough so a little scared a little |
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| excited I don't know which one is is more so but uh you know I'm thankful to |
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| have a pretty amazing wife uh and Laura and then the girls are you know they're close today so we had three in three |
| 10:48 |
| years we call those uh we affectionately call that the Dark Ages in our life |
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| from zero to three kids fairly quickly and uh grad school working at the time |
| 11:00 |
| you know and going from zero to three kids it was uh it was quite an interesting Journey during those times |
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| yeah lack of sleep and and it's amazing how we get through it well enjoy these |
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| times um my two daughters in high school um just got their belly buttons pierced |
| 11:16 |
| the other day and my wife was all beat up about it um because I I gave him the go ahead but I said babe it's better |
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| than a neck tattoo and she was kind of tear it up she said no that's gonna be their boyfriends now |
| 11:27 |
| uh I I I usually have effectively said um the uh The Matrix of good decision |
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| making and neck tattoos uh are perfectly inversely correlated yeah |
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| you know like they are they do not as one goes up the other Goes Down And so |
| 11:48 |
| there's a lot of places you can get tattoos on the neck I would usually say is not a good idea |
| 11:54 |
| yeah anywhere above the net we call that the we call that the tooth to tattoo |
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| ratio in physical therapy school |
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| oh man so Ryan it kind of all joking aside here if you don't mind you know I |
| 12:12 |
| I know um you're such a humble guy you don't want to delve a ton into to your your background and injury but I kind of want |
| 12:19 |
| to get into you know your background of joining the military and and sort of the story if you don't mind of of the |
| 12:26 |
| Rangers because I think it's so cool um just how the Rangers kind of stood up and you know people don't understand |
| 12:31 |
| that we geographically in the U.S there's the regiments are kind of in different spots as well as kind of how |
| 12:37 |
| they deal with things around the world they also kind of let's get into more Memorial Day and then we have a huge |
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| tribute to someone that was it was someone else did both of them we really yeah and man looked up to a ton it |
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| really it really hurt us this year when this person passed yeah yeah so I mean |
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| uh you know originally from from Boise uh just outside of Boise my parents are you know Outdoors was how why we ended |
| 13:02 |
| my parents you know move from from California to Idaho it was they always say they opened they uh affectionately |
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| call them big hippies from the 70s but uh you know they're um you know my dad is a super competitive triathlete and |
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| Outdoors my mom is I would say the quiet uh athlete of the family so she just she just goes out there and works and still |
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| like pulls my dad around everywhere when they they're you know in their 70s riding their bikes around Europe |
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| but uh Outdoors was what we did and that's why we grew up in Idaho and so uh |
| 13:31 |
| my parents say they opened up a map and picked the greenest spot out there and that's how we ended up just outside of |
| 13:36 |
| Boise and having a life where you could be in the outdoors and physical it was |
| 13:43 |
| that was growing about was who I was and and then you know Sports were such a |
| 13:49 |
| huge part of it and and I always I laughed where I said like I wanted to be a professional athlete and then realized I wasn't good at any sports so the next |
| 13:56 |
| best place that you can get paid to work out and do things out is in the in the |
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| military and so I think every young you know boy you know and I think maybe |
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| where I grew up at the time was hey you played you know you played army man and had the little army soldiers and then in |
| 14:14 |
| my formative years really you know would watch the news and do different things and I vividly remember Desert Storm one |
| 14:22 |
| um so in 91 and then uh which I think for me was where I found out about the Rangers is in uh operation Gothic |
| 14:28 |
| serpent right so that's Black Op down is what I think people effectively calls in 1993 and |
| 14:34 |
| um that was such a huge piece to learn about this and so there's a obviously |
| 14:40 |
| the famous book Black Hawk Down uh which read I think that book came out in like 95. |
| 14:47 |
| um I think was when the book came out in the movies you know I would call it early 2000s |
| 14:53 |
| but finding out about this incredibly Elite |
| 14:59 |
| um traditional infantry force it I just that was for me it was one or two and |
| 15:04 |
| then I think for once you get into the military and you realize how much of a small population actually |
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| does that yeah uh you're like well try it and then if it works out it's that'd |
| 15:17 |
| be awesome and um but if you bank on that usually those are the folks that that don't right like |
| 15:23 |
| I remember you know I'd go to West Point find out about West Point in the mid 90s and man you mean because you know my |
| 15:29 |
| parents are Educators finding out about hey this is what the military is and I |
| 15:35 |
| wanted to be a military oh and you can go to school and this is what West Point is I was like this is all I want to be |
| 15:41 |
| this is all I want to do and so I was able to go there for like a kind of Summer uh experience Camp uh I think |
| 15:48 |
| before my junior year came back and was like all right that's what I want to do um and 911 had had just happened |
| 15:56 |
| um and so it was very you know 9 11 happened literally as I got back and that kind of sealed the deal for me and |
| 16:04 |
| was like this is what I want to do and this is how I want to go be part of it and thankfully you know uh Iowa says I'm |
| 16:12 |
| you know I'm sure it would have been harder from other places uh but Idaho it's like you know I I could get it was |
| 16:18 |
| easier I think from just a population standpoint to get a nomination but was luckily to get accepted and uh to go you |
| 16:25 |
| know we but I will you probably know this story actually I know you do Johnny my wife will regularly tell me that uh |
| 16:31 |
| West Point was her safety school because she turned it down and so she she got in |
| 16:36 |
| and and decided not to go uh because her dad and uncles are grads but uh she'll |
| 16:42 |
| regularly tell me that it was her safety school so always reminding who you know who's better at most yeah my safety |
| 16:49 |
| school was Austin Community College if I didn't get into UT I thought you would have said A M I mean |
| 16:54 |
| yes I should have my I have such a good friend here uh |
| 17:01 |
| locally uh now and he's he's big Longhorn guy and he uh he won't even |
| 17:07 |
| refer to that them as a college um and um so but uh yeah so that was |
| 17:14 |
| kind of what I wanted to do um and when I you know I was in them at West Point and you know you've got to |
| 17:20 |
| compete for what you do want to do in the army you know your class rank determines what job what what you want |
| 17:27 |
| to do and was really thankful enough to be able to to get selected as infantry because normally in years past and I |
| 17:34 |
| think now it's not really competitive to to pick infantry most folks want to you |
| 17:39 |
| know be helicopter Pilots or they want to go be doctors or they want to go be Military Intelligence like my years a |
| 17:47 |
| huge population wanted to be infantry that's why you joined after 9 11 like that was a 911 thing right yeah and it's |
| 17:53 |
| super competitive um and we we joke now and then I you |
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| know and so like when I was there and we pick infantry all of my friend group |
| 18:05 |
| um we would this is how I ended up this was like what I always think signifies |
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| most people compete when you go compete about what unit or what place you want to post you pick uh a place based on a |
| 18:20 |
| location so infant you know Hawaii or Italy a lot of guys in my unit what we would do is we they'd pick out this it |
| 18:26 |
| was a calendar we called it the patch chart that's what it was referred to and it had a deployment calendar and so you |
| 18:32 |
| knew what units were deploying at what times and so we would lay this out and be like okay what unit is going to |
| 18:38 |
| deploy at the time I will get there after Ranger school and infantry officers like |
| 18:44 |
| that's what you picked yeah was about how the fastest can I get to the fight |
| 18:49 |
| and and you know again luckily is graduated went to Ranger school which is |
| 18:55 |
| obviously Leadership School in uh airborne and kind of did the basic infantry officer stuff and and deployed |
| 19:01 |
| pretty quickly afterwards to Afghanistan and so um you know got expense the chance to to |
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| do that which was you know what we call the Wild Wild West at the time um was because a lot of focus was on |
| 19:14 |
| Iraq and it was a very informative you know I would call it transformative and uh |
| 19:19 |
| developmental for me as a human as a leader as an officer because it was it was unique and you |
| 19:27 |
| know you're you're um at that time in Northeast Afghanistan if you got in trouble like there was |
| 19:33 |
| nobody coming and so it was it was you and um but thankfully and I you know this is I |
| 19:40 |
| think what we're getting to the Rangers was able to put a packet in and get invited to come selected to be part of uh the ranger regiment and so how that |
| 19:47 |
| process works is you put in a paper application and they have a board or they select and say sure we'd like to |
| 19:52 |
| invite you to come to rasp which is called Ranger assessment assessment and selection |
| 19:58 |
| um program uh it's called rasp 2 for officers and you go there for I think three or four weeks it's been a decade |
| 20:04 |
| or longer since I'm in but um and you go and you go through the physical process you go through a board |
| 20:09 |
| and then you know was luckily enough to get selected to go to third range Battalion and is that down at Benning |
| 20:15 |
| did she go through yeah Benning rasp is it bending and then um you get selected and you go to the |
| 20:21 |
| one of the three battalions so there's third second and first I was you know selected and and had kind of been |
| 20:26 |
| penciled in by Third um and I will tell you is there's few |
| 20:32 |
| things in life that I have found um that live up to the hype that what |
| 20:38 |
| you put on something on a pedestal um about an organization or a group of |
| 20:44 |
| people or you know like sometimes he says like you know in in uh in the civilian world or corporate world you're |
| 20:50 |
| like oh that business looks great oh man those guys have a menu again it's like the grass is greener and then you get on |
| 20:56 |
| the other side of the fence and it's AstroTurf and you're like yeah or you know it's it's fertilized with with |
| 21:02 |
| manure right that's another thing but uh I got to range regimen and and it lived |
| 21:09 |
| up to every bit of the hype uh the professionals that exist in that |
| 21:14 |
| organization at every level um it is you know you see why the and |
| 21:20 |
| you not only are you selected to be there you earn your right to stay there every day |
| 21:25 |
| and so it you know it was it was such a great time and and |
| 21:31 |
| um had a really uh good experience there um obviously you know getting hurt while |
| 21:37 |
| I was there and then leaving the military and um that was obviously not my choice now my |
| 21:43 |
| life is is great and I love it now yeah but uh and I think at the time it was right for me to get out when I did |
| 21:50 |
| obviously you know went to San Antonio and and spent obviously the great time with you but the ranger regimen is not |
| 21:55 |
| sure if it's a great time but yeah there were some good times not a great time I could admit it was |
| 22:02 |
| not my favorite time of my life but uh you know I said I left uh left with a |
| 22:08 |
| kid and I'll never you know that was uh a super great thing for my life but uh the |
| 22:15 |
| ranger regiment you know for those that don't know it is the Army's Premier light infantry unit right it's it's |
| 22:23 |
| um a a piece of uh Special Operations that |
| 22:28 |
| specializes in direct action so whether that's um season airfields that's really kind |
| 22:34 |
| of the national command Authority right when you think of Panama or Grenada or jumping into Iraq or Afghanistan those |
| 22:40 |
| were Rangers right season airfields but in the global Wars on terrorism days |
| 22:45 |
| it transformed into a raid force and so all the blood Ranger regiment what we |
| 22:51 |
| did every night was we planned raids uh to go after guys that are not good and |
| 22:59 |
| not just guys but gals but most of the time all guys right into these are these are guys that that uh uh if they came up |
| 23:06 |
| on the radar of Special Operations they're not good people and they were moving against what would be you know |
| 23:12 |
| life limb happiness of of either our soldiers or the population and that was what we were tasked to do and so it uh |
| 23:20 |
| it was uh it was a very unique um ability and and they're very good at |
| 23:26 |
| it I was lucky enough to uh to be along for a ride short period of time but uh |
| 23:32 |
| it was it was a great experience and um they they are pretty special organization and it's uh they got some |
| 23:39 |
| pretty special people which I know a little top of my Joe cap and yeah I will tell you it TR it it allowed me I |
| 23:47 |
| think to be who I am today um just you know the expectations of |
| 23:53 |
| professionalism and the expectations of Excellence that you know you have to bring every day with it and that's |
| 23:59 |
| that's the Excellence is the standard not not the the goal yeah well I know that's probably a long |
| 24:06:00 |
| answer no no I love it I mean I'm gonna back up on a little bit of things but um |
| 24:11:00 |
| yeah you know I'm also a just for ease of the conversation of Black Hawk Down Baby because I was in college when that |
| 24:19:00 |
| happened right um and so I remember how much those pictures affected me of seeing them |
| 24:26:00 |
| dragging our servicemen down the you know just down the road you know they were basically naked I remember it also |
| 24:33:00 |
| made me really want to keep my grades up because I was worried there was going to be a draft of that you know that was the first award forever I was like oh |
| 24:39:00 |
| my dad was the right I'm gonna I'm gonna abuse in the service um but I I do remember that was just you |
| 24:46:00 |
| know like wow and then I read the book yep and then that was the first you know I was like what this Ranger's thing is |
| 24:53:00 |
| crazy and then kind of when I get into you know the how you guys kind of work hand in hand with the you know I think |
| 24:58:00 |
| we can say their names at this point in time I remember my boss always said you don't say their names out loud but you |
| 25:04:00 |
| know work talking with the working with the Deltas and then Black Hawk Down came out and if you haven't seen that I mean |
| 25:09:00 |
| that's a great movie and just seeing how rangers are as well as the Deltas Blackhawk Down is one uh and it's it's |
| 25:16:00 |
| even my girls at this point know and I and I you know people that I work with and they know and it's one of the few |
| 25:22:00 |
| TNT it's one of those movies that are on TNT that I have to if it's a Saturday afternoon Black Hawk Down it's like well |
| 25:28:00 |
| I know what I'm doing today I know what I'm I know what I'm getting into you cannot if it's on you cannot walk away I |
| 25:35:00 |
| mean you have to watch it and dude it's got like now when you watch it you're like it has every like male stud looking |
| 25:42:00 |
| dude in the world from Tom Hardy like I know Eric Bana right I mean the the |
| 25:48:00 |
| geeky dork is you and McGregor it's like that's how that's how many |
| 25:54:00 |
| studs are in it and I'll I'll go back to also you know I've been lucky enough to go to all the ranger battalions and |
| 26:00:00 |
| Delta and all that you know I would get to go visit dude when you leave these Rangers science I felt so pumped up and |
| 26:07:00 |
| like God Bless America like you know there's something they bump in the air there I'm like this is just it is also |
| 26:15:00 |
| the most competitive place that I've ever heard it is yeah I did not think it could get worse than like my friend friend group at West Point yeah |
| 26:23:00 |
| no it'd be like in Kyle they wear basically underwear for sure so that's the only problem I have with the Rangers |
| 26:31:00 |
| Ranger panties uh nobody it would be like well I'm gonna be here at 5 30 and |
| 26:37:00 |
| then the next day it's like well I'm gonna be here at 5 25 and then I'll be here at five o'clock doing push-ups so |
| 26:42:00 |
| like you know and it just it just it's the culture that is bred there and right |
| 26:48:00 |
| there's all the good and all the bad that come with it but it is it creates such a |
| 26:53:00 |
| uh infectious culture of Excellence that is is really I have never seen anything |
| 27:01:00 |
| like it obviously my my good friends uh uh uh left Ranger regimen and gone on to other you know very specialized Mission |
| 27:09:00 |
| units um here kind of maybe so them I I can't speak to those uh but I can speak of you |
| 27:17:00 |
| stick 800 18 19 to 27 sometimes you get you |
| 27:23:00 |
| know the colonel law or general all rats they're you know the commanders but they're only in their 40s of the most |
| 27:29:00 |
| competitive testosterone filled you know humans on the planet and it creates |
| 27:36:00 |
| something pretty special how hard was it to get through Ranger School uh well |
| 27:41:00 |
| Ranger school obviously different than Ranger regiment um Ranger school is is just a Leadership |
| 27:46:00 |
| School right and a lot of folks can go to it uh yeah I mean is it impossible no |
| 27:51:00 |
| because you know a lot of folks do it that uh is it would I ever want to do it again absolutely not I went in dinner |
| 28:00:00 |
| um and I went uh you know it so it was cold and it was rainy and folks got hypothermia I think one of the |
| 28:08:00 |
| um you know there's a few things obviously now living in Atlanta and close to Dahlonega where Mountain phase is and I remember a saying is you know |
| 28:16:00 |
| you get there first time the mountains you look up and you see the huge mountains the Tennessee Valley divide you're going to climb and |
| 28:21:00 |
| there's nothing but character in them Hills is saying is |
| 28:27:00 |
| that's awesome uh you know I work with a A you know a guy in another business uh |
| 28:33:00 |
| that has our same Financial sponsor and he's a Navy SEAL and uh he and I were just kind of talking about some shared |
| 28:39:00 |
| experiences he's very similar age as mine and he said you go into the surf and you come out of a changed human |
| 28:46:00 |
| yeah and I I wouldn't I don't you know Ranger schools obviously it's very different the buds and you know they're |
| 28:53:00 |
| totally different experiences and the longevity of it versus hell week versus the food deprivation it's a very very |
| 28:59:00 |
| different experience um but I still think it's the same way you you you you're just different and in |
| 29:07:00 |
| terms of what you can push yourself to what you you find very differently |
| 29:12:00 |
| around what the difference of between pain and discomfort is and you if |
| 29:17:00 |
| anybody have I think you taught me that more than anybody in my life is there's a difference between pain and discomfort |
| 29:23:00 |
| yeah when you're learning and going through Rehabilitation after a major injury it's hey what is what is pain and |
| 29:30:00 |
| what is discomfort because discomfort is good and pain is not and right right I think where you got to learn when you |
| 29:36:00 |
| come through it on the other side you're a changed person that's for sure yeah I remember being down in San Diego and just looking at their buds training and |
| 29:42:00 |
| we didn't get to see it because it was going to be the next morning but they had this giant rope that went from one |
| 29:48:00 |
| end to the other it was like 80 feet in the air on these two towers and at the |
| 29:53:00 |
| end of all this like crazy stuff they would have to get on that rope and and Scoot across the rope and right over |
| 29:59:00 |
| there we're like so how do y'all what do you all harness them in case they're falling the guy goes oh no man we don't |
| 30:05:00 |
| harness them man there's sand below we call them lawn darts if they fall they just go down and their legs are sticking |
| 30:11:00 |
| out of the sand when they're done like yes it's a different world than what I'm used to yeah yeah I want to clarify too |
| 30:19:00 |
| and I I did misspeak because this is something that gets confused to people people are going through Ranger school |
| 30:24:00 |
| they're like I'm a ranger you hear this with some of these politicians you know yeah verse you know you know they're |
| 30:29:00 |
| like I got my tab versus I actually went through regiment yeah just clarify that yeah and I I think some folks uh you |
| 30:35:00 |
| know I I there are some folks that still kind of beat their chest around it at the end of the day like it's uh |
| 30:42:00 |
| it's a it's a way around it right and now I will tell you there's a very different uh pathway of Ranger regiments |
| 30:48:00 |
| I I always say say once you put on a tambourne that's a it's a different life and you live it you've done different |
| 30:54:00 |
| things and but uh yeah it's it's a uh it is it's a there are two very different |
| 31:00:00 |
| uh aspects of it not to Discount one or the other it's just they're different |
| 31:05:00 |
| and people if you watch Black Hawk Down we see Rangers and Delta or these tier |
| 31:10:00 |
| one kind of groups working very close together can you can you speak under that relationship how those missions kind of work |
| 31:16:00 |
| yeah uh again it's probably totally different than it is now but they work really Co you know we we would work with |
| 31:23:00 |
| a lot of different units whether it's a CL unit um that exists or it's a Delta unit that |
| 31:29:00 |
| exists or um you know there are some other ones out there right and we all have diff |
| 31:34:00 |
| like what we bring to bear uh to the fight is very different right it's uh |
| 31:40:00 |
| um there is uh uh Rangers right when you bring you know 60 to you know 50 to 60 |
| 31:48:00 |
| heavily armed uh very uh well-trained infantry |
| 31:54:00 |
| um soldiers like that's what you bring with Ranger regiment versus you know maybe somebody that's strained in counterterrorism or something like that |
| 32:00:00 |
| and so it's a they're complementary forces right like uh Rangers show up with machine guns and you know all |
| 32:06:00 |
| different types of things that uh mortar systems that you know that maybe not a different special Mission Unit might not |
| 32:12:00 |
| have because they're just different organizational structures but they'll go to missions and we do we work collaboratively together right yeah um |
| 32:19:00 |
| at least I mean again that was how it was again when I was it was very different but uh |
| 32:26:00 |
| um they have different different Mission sets and so but they they're all you |
| 32:31:00 |
| know at the same end goal of trying to trying to be that Elite raid for us if that's what the mission is I thought |
| 32:37:00 |
| that was so cool when we were all together at the center for the Intrepid was you know you had across the spectrum |
| 32:43:00 |
| of all these these different groups your your young infantry Kid Young Marine you |
| 32:48:00 |
| know up to you know them all looking up to you and Ranger guys and you'd have the the other special horses guys but |
| 32:54:00 |
| everyone it was almost like a an even playing field but you guys were able to drive those other other folks so well |
| 33:01:00 |
| you know just seeing the way they looked up to y'all because sometimes they got sick of my and I would have to ring |
| 33:08:00 |
| in like a Ryan Keough or some of our other buddies that were there to you know kind of like okay I think some of |
| 33:14:00 |
| it comes yeah some of it comes with age um some of it comes but I think too is like just the expectations right I mean |
| 33:20:00 |
| we both know young Rangers they were young SEALS or or the marsok we both |
| 33:26:00 |
| know some folks that were from the marine Special Operations unit it's that same the same people that |
| 33:32:00 |
| gravitate to those organizations they just uh they have like the expectation about |
| 33:38:00 |
| it and then a lot of times what you found and even you know and obviously me trying to to go back |
| 33:44:00 |
| um is you don't uh people ask it's like you don't want to leave the All-Star team once you make it yeah you know there |
| 33:51:00 |
| were folks their entire life have been spent hey I want to go be a MARSOC Raider or I |
| 33:57:00 |
| want to go be a Navy SEAL or I want to go back to the unit right to going back to being a an operator |
| 34:03:00 |
| and that's what they do that's what they know um I think you know as we'll talk about |
| 34:09:00 |
| I'm sure later on that that strikes both ways if that's all that you know |
| 34:16:00 |
| and that is what you define Yourself by man that's tough that is so tough to get |
| 34:23:00 |
| over it is um and I think everybody's got to find a way |
| 34:28:00 |
| um to do it and I you know um we can kind of transition to that too |
| 34:34:00 |
| as I yeah I thought about as you know as we were talking about it um somebody asked me a long time ago about |
| 34:41:00 |
| how you deal with the transition and uh if you've never been to Arlington |
| 34:47:00 |
| you should go um it is it is |
| 34:52:00 |
| when you I'm out I go to the West Point Cemetery when I'm near there because I just have some very close friends that are buried there or Arlington is another |
| 34:58:00 |
| way and if you've never been there it is such a powerful |
| 35:04:00 |
| visual representation yeah of of the sacrifice that have been made by |
| 35:12:00 |
| such a small portion of the population and one of the things that which I I put |
| 35:19:00 |
| on that I uh that that really has made me kind of think about is if you think of people on |
| 35:26:00 |
| earth um that have been here that should that could be or should be |
| 35:32:00 |
| um resp like proud of their professional accomplishments that would you know the |
| 35:39:00 |
| medals on their chest or the the units that they LED or the things that they |
| 35:45:00 |
| did it would be in that Cemetery yeah but the common things that you see |
| 35:52:00 |
| beloved father um you know uh um |
| 35:57:00 |
| cherished husband uh friend those are the things that they |
| 36:03:00 |
| wear yeah on their head right it is and that really kind of impacted me it was |
| 36:08:00 |
| like what matters and like what am I like what what do I want to be defined by and I will not let myself be defined by |
| 36:16:00 |
| my injury or my time in the Army like that doesn't mean that I'm less proud of it it is just like what you like what |
| 36:23:00 |
| are you going to be defined by and I think that that is where our I think some folks sometimes struggle is they |
| 36:31:00 |
| they're not allowing themselves to Define themselves other than what they did yes |
| 36:39:00 |
| dude you couldn't have said that better and I I think that is one of the keys that in the code that we haven't been |
| 36:45:00 |
| able to crack is not being defined by that and it is so indoctrinated that this is who you are this is who you are |
| 36:51:00 |
| this is who you are um yeah making that transition is crazy tough and I think what what another |
| 36:57:00 |
| piece is is realizing how and you with that that's all you know right and |
| 37:03:00 |
| you've been in the military for 20 years in your game you know what success looks like the |
| 37:10:00 |
| next rank the next position the next job that it is defined a lot of times it's |
| 37:18:00 |
| by time it's or it's by experience it's this unit |
| 37:23:00 |
| will define success for me and that is like really powerful and |
| 37:29:00 |
| easy for folks to view when you get out of the military you don't have that and |
| 37:36:00 |
| so you have to Define your own success and I've you know for me it's it's even I've struggled in ways of saying like |
| 37:44:00 |
| where I'm you know I'll a huge you know if I'll take a new role or get something here and I'm like man I I do |
| 37:51:00 |
| not believe I can be successful and like that that self-doubt of Jesus this is |
| 37:56:00 |
| hard I've watched a lot of people fail and um I think what what you get to is |
| 38:02:00 |
| you gotta Define your own success because I had you know somebody kind of give me some feedback when I was really |
| 38:08:00 |
| strong he said look your your problem is you have a view of Success Through one lens and that's Excellence that's it it |
| 38:15:00 |
| is if this is the goal there is it is a pass or fail there is no other thing |
| 38:22:00 |
| other than Excellence is success but what you have to help redefine is |
| 38:28:00 |
| like you get to Define Excellence by the way and that was what he told me it was like it's time and resources to achieve |
| 38:34:00 |
| the mission in which you have it stand and so if you you get to Define accidents and I think people struggle |
| 38:40:00 |
| that's another aspect when people struggles they're like I can't I'm not successful I'm not I don't I don't know |
| 38:45:00 |
| where the next move is or I don't I see other these other people doing these things that I'm not doing and they that |
| 38:51:00 |
| is such a deflating for somebody that has had such a defined success so when |
| 38:57:00 |
| you take that and you lose your identity for a lot of folks again this is how I |
| 39:03:00 |
| viewed it so I'm not saying this is you know this is Ryan keough's opinion it is I think that's where a lot of |
| 39:11:00 |
| folks really struggle and I you know it's not that I haven't struggled at |
| 39:17:00 |
| times but like I didn't I didn't allow myself and I didn't have a partner in Laura that would allow me to yeah you |
| 39:23:00 |
| know and it was like Hey I get out and I have three kids in three years and it's like no no you are a dad and this is |
| 39:30:00 |
| what we do here um and this is you know like this is we're successful like this is what's |
| 39:36:00 |
| we're gonna do as a team and uh that helped me |
| 39:41:00 |
| I also know that that's been that's been huge and I think that's where when I call it the good the bad the ugly |
| 39:48:00 |
| of getting out of the military is you have that is is like those sometimes hit people with just it's a brick wall for |
| 39:55:00 |
| some folks it's hard yeah yeah one excellence |
| 40:00:00 |
| is life or death when you're in the military almost you know and so it's easy to say like I'm gonna put everything into this and like you said |
| 40:07:00 |
| how do you redefine what Excellence is going to be for you at this point when it could just be this is just to get a |
| 40:13:00 |
| promotion in this job and they're almost looking down on it but it's like man you gotta again there's way more that |
| 40:19:00 |
| defines you and and the dad the father all of those pieces were such huge game |
| 40:26:00 |
| changers for guys like you and so many other of our folks that we saw that that succeeded was that I mean I always would |
| 40:34:00 |
| tell the spouse you are the key component here |
| 40:39:00 |
| that is the like the anchoring you know it was it was such an anchor for me |
| 40:44:00 |
| there it's been an anchor everywhere is like you know it's you I mean I think you guys know this too is picking the |
| 40:52:00 |
| right spouse a partner is probably the most important decision you'll ever make |
| 40:57:00 |
| it is and you know and I think that's that is where you know for me it's |
| 41:05:00 |
| helped me be successful and and help me and that transition out of |
| 41:12:00 |
| right there is no there is no end there is what what even in the military times there's there's end lines right there's |
| 41:19:00 |
| Finish Lines I'm going to finish command and then I'm gonna go do something else |
| 41:24:00 |
| in this you know in the civilian World there is no Finish Line I know the |
| 41:30:00 |
| journey is the the entire aspect that is the race yeah and uh you know there's |
| 41:37:00 |
| the accreditations oh I got this badge that means I can do this like that |
| 41:43:00 |
| doesn't exist yeah I know I wish you did I would win my email badge every day |
| 41:52:00 |
| 20 emails today exactly and then I think that those are but I you know I think |
| 41:59:00 |
| we're we're at you the balance is is not allowing |
| 42:04:00 |
| the military to Define you but not allowing you to lose the things |
| 42:11:00 |
| that are special about you it and what it did for you and I think that's where |
| 42:17:00 |
| like that's a constant I would say like back and forth for me is you know if you've |
| 42:24:00 |
| ever done a disc personality right um the high D the drive I'm about as |
| 42:31:00 |
| high like there literally is no higher D on a disc for me uh than that exists and |
| 42:36:00 |
| but knowing is like that has equal ramifications the other way |
| 42:42:00 |
| right and being aware of yeah and uh that's those are all like |
| 42:47:00 |
| aspects that I think people deal with in the transition I I hopefully this is you know what what we wanted to talk about |
| 42:53:00 |
| and you know kind of pieces yeah the transition is what worked for me and so I that's going to lead us into |
| 42:59:00 |
| [Music] Memorial Day and difficulty with the transition because you know we lost |
| 43:06:00 |
| someone special and it's in ripples through our community of friends I know through your Ranger Community |
| 43:13:00 |
| um and this guy is a Legend um and you know yeah I just wanna I |
| 43:19:00 |
| don't wanna I know it's hard for you to even talk about it but if you want to kind of give the the backstory of Joe |
| 43:25:00 |
| cap and yeah um you know Memorial Day uh at first is |
| 43:31:00 |
| you know uh I don't view it as a holiday that can't be celebrated and |
| 43:38:00 |
| some people do they're like it's a sad you know it's a sad day and yeah it is but it is meant like I view it through |
| 43:46:00 |
| we get the opportunity to celebrate the sacrifices of people |
| 43:52:00 |
| and folks that have that have made such an impact on me and |
| 43:59:00 |
| community and in our country and I I use that so that's the thing we were talking |
| 44:04:00 |
| earlier like I'm I'm looking for we leave tomorrow for the beach we're gonna go down to South Carolina to the beach |
| 44:09:00 |
| and I do a thing that and this will now be the fourth year in a row that we've done |
| 44:14:00 |
| it um and I'm gonna make it a you know tradition is I literally like put together a presentation like this is the |
| 44:22:00 |
| nerve like work nerd in me about a friend or a soldier Ranger of mine |
| 44:29:00 |
| that passed away and I make a slideshow presentation this is who they are this |
| 44:35:00 |
| is where they're from this is what they did this is where they grew up here's a pictures of us together here is |
| 44:42:00 |
| um here is what where they where they died this is what they were doing when they died and it puts a face and a name |
| 44:50:00 |
| actually it puts an my way I described it it puts an address on Memorial Day |
| 44:57:00 |
| yeah and my girls have like ingrained this now and so they go into Memorial |
| 45:03:00 |
| Day and they're like who are we celebrating this year uh like Daddy tell me about who we're |
| 45:08:00 |
| celebrating this year wow I'm like you get like we're gonna find out about it and like |
| 45:13:00 |
| being able to like put an address to Memorial Day not only is it helpful for |
| 45:21:00 |
| me and it's like um therapeutic right because I get to like dig up old pictures of like me and |
| 45:27:00 |
| this guy together and I'm like holy smokes I was in shape |
| 45:33:00 |
| what happened yeah or or B and then |
| 45:38:00 |
| to like it's therapeutic to like think of the good times and not |
| 45:43:00 |
| what has been very hard uh is looking at the things that they missed |
| 45:51:00 |
| out on um you know I got um a guy that we did last year such a |
| 45:57:00 |
| very close friend his name is Jay Jones who's my West Point classmate and uh was in seven special portions group and uh |
| 46:04:00 |
| was killed in Afghanistan in 2000 and um uh I believe it's 2000 yes 2014. and |
| 46:13:00 |
| um and it was incredibly tough for me to |
| 46:18:00 |
| think about he didn't get to be a dad and he didn't get like the world didn't get to see how |
| 46:25:00 |
| unfairly it was of how good he was at everything how smart he was how athletic he was |
| 46:32:00 |
| like the things like how it was annoyingly good at everything and the world we missed out on that |
| 46:42:00 |
| that was sad for me but I was able to like therapeutically talk about it with my girls about you |
| 46:48:00 |
| guys let me tell you about Jay and like I gotta tell you some funny stories and my wife Laura gets to sit there about |
| 46:54:00 |
| you know we had him and our other friend over for dinner one night she's like I just had to listen to you three idiots |
| 46:59:00 |
| just make fun of each other for an hour and a half yeah like that was what we did yeah yeah and uh and |
| 47:08:00 |
| so but that's how I use Memorial Day one like I'm always like that's I will like |
| 47:13:00 |
| for me I will never work on a Memorial Day in my life like I don't yes I don't care what it is and that is like you can |
| 47:21:00 |
| you know when somebody wants to hire me it's like yeah that's great I'll do that except if it's on Memorial Day like I will not that is one I'll work on |
| 47:27:00 |
| Veterans Day you know it is what it is and like hopefully I cannot have to and I get to go do something but Memorial Day is so |
| 47:34:00 |
| it carries so much emotional weight from me in a good and bad way so |
| 47:40:00 |
| that's interesting this is cathartic and um you know my Latino wife and her |
| 47:45:00 |
| family they celebrate Day of the Dead it's a very it's you know pre-coco |
| 47:51:00 |
| they've been doing this forever you know and it's very serious to them and my |
| 47:56:00 |
| father-in-law he basically died from drinking himself to death from from |
| 48:01:00 |
| Vietnam you know three tours my mother-in-law said I don't remember him ever sleeping through a night you know he always had these night terrors and |
| 48:08:00 |
| but it is almost the same for her she she brings out all his medals and you |
| 48:14:00 |
| know Day of the Dead and we celebrate him and it's that's interesting because we we always kind of do the flag in the |
| 48:20:00 |
| ground and talk about him on Memorial Day that I'm gonna I'm gonna bring this up this weekend I think that's a great idea and I um you know it is such a it's |
| 48:29:00 |
| such a great way of like one like forcing myself to like go look at pictures and go look at and like think |
| 48:36:00 |
| of memories um you know I always say sometimes like time itself uh it's like a it's like a |
| 48:44:00 |
| sine wave right like it's easy and then it's hard and then it's easy and you know it's like because you get to view |
| 48:50:00 |
| at least I do view these sacrifices through the lens that I carry with me |
| 48:57:00 |
| today right because like I look at like incredible men and women uh that don't |
| 49:05:00 |
| get the opportunity to experience the things that I've gotten to experience |
| 49:10:00 |
| and that's uh that is I think is is been fairly sad |
| 49:15:00 |
| um so I say all that is you know around Memorial Day it's such a you know and some folks like oh no it's |
| 49:22:00 |
| it's not a beach holiday and it's like look it that is on us to educate people |
| 49:28:00 |
| um I don't you know where folks will you know they the the the the difference the chasm between you know the folks that |
| 49:36:00 |
| have served that don't serve it's not because they don't want to know it's they just don't right and it's hard you |
| 49:44:00 |
| know I got especially like moving to Atlanta and being you know the Social Circle of like not around anybody that |
| 49:51:00 |
| that was in the military a lot of folks don't even know somebody that was in the military which is so |
| 49:57:00 |
| hard to Fathom if that's all you've ever known right like I went to college but folks that went to the military I went |
| 50:03:00 |
| you know my grant and it's like oh my God you know this person well my grandfather served in the Navy and then there was no one in their lives |
| 50:10:00 |
| that serve or they know I knew this one kid in high school 20 years ago that joined the army and |
| 50:18:00 |
| that's their only connection to it that is um that's on us you know as veterans and |
| 50:25:00 |
| the folks that you know that know the sacrifice to help educate folks and it's not shouldn't be like a hammer that |
| 50:33:00 |
| you're not celebrating the sacrifices you know right it's like no no no let me tell you about how awesome this dude was |
| 50:41:00 |
| let me tell you about the sacrifices they've made and that's what I try to do |
| 50:46:00 |
| and I try to celebrate it with my girls because it you know that's what matters to me it's fantastic are you doing Joe |
| 50:52:00 |
| this year uh yeah yeah we'll do Joe this year so um you know so so Joe cap man |
| 51:00:00 |
| um I I I'm gonna be very proud if I get through this next time uh I'm being emotional uh man I I don't |
| 51:08:00 |
| even know where to start with Joe other than |
| 51:14:00 |
| um he was in my opinion specialty made by God that people like that they don't |
| 51:21:00 |
| like that is one of one and um so if the government said I'm |
| 51:27:00 |
| gonna make a ranger out of parts they yeah Joe they they built Joe |
| 51:33:00 |
| basically yeah so if for those physical and and mental mental spiritual everything even though look you just |
| 51:40:00 |
| look it's kind of like when he shows a picture of um what's his name uh Tillman uh Pat Tillman Pat Tillman you're like |
| 51:46:00 |
| yeah he looks like special you're like okay he had muscles he had muscles in his chin I didn't even know they had |
| 51:52:00 |
| muscles that's Joe man um but for Joe kapocheski |
| 51:58:00 |
| for for those that don't don't that know who who Joe is so Joe uh from |
| 52:04:00 |
| um just outside of uh is in the Northeast I believe just outside of Boston joined the army |
| 52:09:00 |
| um before just just before right after 9 11 um and enlisted to become a ranger |
| 52:15:00 |
| um so Joe you know uh jumped into Iraq has a you know had a mustard stain from jumping in that's a mustard Sansa an |
| 52:22:00 |
| award you get from from a combat jump there's only been three since 2001 all of them down by third ranger battalion |
| 52:28:00 |
| um I'm from Special Operations there's some other folks that have obviously done them but um and uh |
| 52:35:00 |
| uh in 2005 was in Iraq and lost his uh was is injured in a grenade attack |
| 52:42:00 |
| and um injured his leg tried to have limb salvaging and ended up being an elective |
| 52:47:00 |
| amputee and so when I showed up the ranger regiment in 2009 |
| 52:53:00 |
| um Joe uh yeah 2009 Joe 2019 2010 Joe |
| 52:58:00 |
| was a newly promoted platoon Sergeant so it was the second McMahon of a platoon |
| 53:03:00 |
| right there was the senior NCO of platoon and I believe it done like four or five deployments post amputation yeah |
| 53:12:00 |
| and was a he was a rasp instructor which is like for the June grasp one the |
| 53:17:00 |
| unlisted guys and the aura that Joe |
| 53:22:00 |
| carried around because of his ability he was a physical |
| 53:27:00 |
| freak of nature where we would work out together and go |
| 53:32:00 |
| on runs and he had one leg and I had two and I could not keep up yeah sub hour 10 miler |
| 53:39:00 |
| with a prosthetic um you know uh he he ran on a Pathfinder |
| 53:46:00 |
| which is like this walking prosthetic he ran five miles and under four minutes in |
| 53:51:00 |
| a prosthetic that is not designed to run yes like that have you told the the |
| 53:58:00 |
| manufacturer of that they couldn't fathom that somebody could do that yeah |
| 54:03:00 |
| and he he had just an Outlook of life that there was no obstacle |
| 54:11:00 |
| that he could not overcome and I think people you know we see pictures of these |
| 54:16:00 |
| service members missing a missing a limb you know in a prosthetic and in their uniform you're like oh these guys are |
| 54:22:00 |
| just all redeploying and doing stuff like that that is not a common thing at all it's it's extremely rare and he was |
| 54:30:00 |
| the first and to be able to do it as a ranger correct and you know it did a |
| 54:35:00 |
| total of 11 deployments with or without his limb which is I believe he did not I want to say he did seven after |
| 54:42:00 |
| um and like I mean literally like in one deployment that that we did at the same time like he took like he would always |
| 54:49:00 |
| carry an extra leg like he took a he took shrapnel in a prosthetic like you know bronze start with Valor for |
| 54:56:00 |
| carrying a guy off the battlefield like I mean just I think that that story is amazing you know that there's he's got a |
| 55:04:00 |
| prosthetic he's backing out as a Ranger a ranger gets shot in the battlefield and fire everywhere and who runs out and |
| 55:12:00 |
| drags this guy back with his prosthetic like it's no nobody's business his joke I would tell you you know how mad he |
| 55:19:00 |
| would be that we were talking about him wearing a prosthetic right now |
| 55:24:00 |
| but and I think you know and obviously with when I got hurt and I remember him walking into my hospital room and being |
| 55:31:00 |
| like what's wrong with you man let's go we got things to do and um I think for him like having that |
| 55:39:00 |
| connection that I had with him allowed me to know it's going to be okay and like I'm gonna get through this and like |
| 55:46:00 |
| that is such an infectious way of viewing like I you know I remember when |
| 55:51:00 |
| we went to the Boston bombing and people were like how'd you get here I'm not uh we got on a plane and drove |
| 55:58:00 |
| and they're like you can drive like yeah dude like I can definitely drive and but |
| 56:05:00 |
| it like when I you know just experience is like Joe can do everything I could do better |
| 56:11:00 |
| than me before my injury and and um I will tell you Joe was an incredible |
| 56:18:00 |
| father of you know two young boys um and this year you know I think got |
| 56:25:00 |
| out of the military a number of years ago um did did retire |
| 56:30:00 |
| um did some some other stuff with the government for a while and I think ultimately uh continue to struggle with |
| 56:38:00 |
| some demons and uh you know unfortunately uh uh took his uh took his own life this year and it |
| 56:45:00 |
| um I think it would have been uh I I really I think struggle with it of |
| 56:53:00 |
| of knowing that I probably should have been there for him more ultimately uh |
| 56:59:00 |
| you know folks are or that's a that's a that's a battle you have to deal with internally and |
| 57:05:00 |
| um you know he had a private I I even said my wife and I were talking about it and uh his service was was fairly |
| 57:11:00 |
| private because I said man um if they were you know he's barely in Arlington and not if they would have had |
| 57:18:00 |
| a public service that I had to have it at like FedEx Field yeah um that was the impact that he he had in |
| 57:25:00 |
| the community not just uh wounded people wounded |
| 57:31:00 |
| soldiers amputees the Special Operations community um Ranger regiment is he he carried with |
| 57:39:00 |
| him I think a lot of that um of being that |
| 57:44:00 |
| you know when you think of Rangers like that's who I think of yeah is is that |
| 57:52:00 |
| he he really was such a |
| 57:57:00 |
| powerful you know symbol and uh man uh I |
| 58:03:00 |
| think obviously the the the worst tragedy is is the fact that you know you get two |
| 58:08:00 |
| boys that don't have their dad and Kim that doesn't have her husband anymore but uh man uh |
| 58:15:00 |
| we're all we're all at a loss because he's not here and |
| 58:22:00 |
| um you know I I've made uh a conscious effort to try to reach out to to more folks in my circle because of |
| 58:30:00 |
| it um if anything just to tell folks hey I love you man and and uh |
| 58:35:00 |
| I wish we could you know I wish we lived near closer we'd get some beers and yeah but uh God he he really was something |
| 58:43:00 |
| special man one of one and uh I miss him and I I I I I thank for every |
| 58:51:00 |
| thankful for everything that he did for me and whether he knew it or not and |
| 58:56:00 |
| what he meant to me whether he knew it or not and I tried to tell him and we'd get together and |
| 59:01:00 |
| um you know we'd have beers and we'd talk about random thing I mean he's just he was |
| 59:07:00 |
| super special yeah well and I think this is you know this is mental |
| 59:14:00 |
| health month in May and also we want to point out for Memorial Day that it's not only for those that you you know might |
| 59:20:00 |
| think it's just on the battlefield the the battle is continuous lots of times and you've done such an amazing job with |
| 59:26:00 |
| yourself um with this but you know you and I both know lots of times if I see a text come |
| 59:32:00 |
| up from you or from anyone back in these days together I I'm really nervous because yeah you know half the time it |
| 59:40:00 |
| is bad news like this so you're and I can't tell you how many times I'm just like no way Joe like and they do feel |
| 59:48:00 |
| like like I said you feel like an ass because you're like dude they got it so together it's always like yeah like and |
| 59:55:00 |
| I should have done something you know I had a I had another very uh close friend of mine |
| 1:00:01 |
| um from the army that we went to West Point together and he was a ranger and then he went to to another special |
| 1:00:06 |
| Mission Unit and he died last April um March late March early yeah last late |
| 1:00:12 |
| March uh of a heart attack um just a Widowmaker and um |
| 1:00:18 |
| I after and then obviously then Joe passed away not too |
| 1:00:23 |
| um soon after and um I I had called two folks |
| 1:00:29 |
| to tell them both and I was like man I haven't talked to this person in seven years and I'm both the times that I've |
| 1:00:37 |
| called them are about things that I should not be having to tell people yeah |
| 1:00:42 |
| and uh that was when I said for me it's like okay I am going to make a concerted effort |
| 1:00:48 |
| to reach out to folks even if it is just if I call them and |
| 1:00:54 |
| they don't it's like look man it's not a I'm not calling you to say one of our other friends is dead yeah and uh that's |
| 1:01:01 |
| I think that's been the uh the hardest thing around |
| 1:01:07 |
| leaving the military is knowing how hard it is and folks |
| 1:01:13 |
| knowing that it it folks struggle and you you know and thankfully I'm like you know I've been |
| 1:01:21 |
| out now longer than I was in which is mind-boggling crazy to me that's crazy we're all now yes you know and I've got |
| 1:01:28 |
| my my you know my first like my classmates are Lieutenant Colonels and like my friends are like full bird |
| 1:01:35 |
| colonels and like next up to be generals and like my you know mentors are multiple star generals retiring |
| 1:01:42 |
| but they all have to leave at some point and you try you know and I think for me |
| 1:01:48 |
| it's like what I've tried to do is just be that sounding board of hey look like this is how this is the things you're |
| 1:01:53 |
| going to run into this is hard and like because I uh I would say incorrectly did it my I like |
| 1:02:03 |
| most of my things my life are done my way and like how I when I got out of the army I just muscled through a lot of |
| 1:02:10 |
| things without resources or people to lean on or things like that I remember this old Ryan Kia |
| 1:02:18 |
| back in the day you know it was like hey uh and I |
| 1:02:23 |
| laughed it was like some people were like well how was your transition and I was like well in the two years after I |
| 1:02:29 |
| got out I went from one to three kids bought two houses moved went to grad |
| 1:02:35 |
| school and switched jobs uh so like I didn't have a time to think |
| 1:02:40 |
| about it other than these were the tasks at hand and how you get through it and I |
| 1:02:48 |
| um it's you still think about it and you still try to get better but that's |
| 1:02:54 |
| um that's where I think you know there's always try to be better and try to help other folks behind you and say hey |
| 1:02:59 |
| here's some resources and I think hopefully uh we as a is a military and that |
| 1:03:07 |
| organization have gotten better as well yeah yeah well man |
| 1:03:12 |
| um this is great stuff and we just want to honor Joe and all the other folks |
| 1:03:18 |
| that have passed on this Memorial Day this is like you said it's not a day of Sorrow it's a data of remembrance and |
| 1:03:26 |
| it's not a joke celebration yeah |
| 1:03:32 |
| there is a book about Joe out there called back in the fight which is really cool and and some really good leaks I |
| 1:03:38 |
| saw a video yesterday I was just looking at it uh Gary sadista thing about Joe um not not on his passing but actually |
| 1:03:45 |
| of some of his accomplishments it was pretty cool on YouTube so there's some great stuff yeah that's you know and I |
| 1:03:51 |
| think uh it's uh what I would imagine uh Chris Kyle was like in in the steel |
| 1:03:57 |
| Community or um you know there's there's certain folks like we know in the Marsa |
| 1:04:03 |
| community everyone knew Joe everyone and it's like |
| 1:04:08 |
| you know like uh obviously Joe and I were were you know I think closer because of our far our similar injuries |
| 1:04:14 |
| we joke that like we would buy shoes together he would get the left I would get the right um but like |
| 1:04:21 |
| um but what I would say is um I fell very lucky that I was one of |
| 1:04:28 |
| the many many people that got to know him and uh you know there are folks that no one better or you know and that's not |
| 1:04:35 |
| I was just not a contest but I'm just fortunate enough to be in that group that um that that got to call him a you know |
| 1:04:42 |
| a friend whether you know that's how I view them and uh he uh he was pretty special and I you know I think I would |
| 1:04:49 |
| say the same thing about about folks about you and and uh well you Johnny and I and I'm gonna I'll use this as a way |
| 1:04:56 |
| because I know you will not toot your own horn um in this way is for those that don't |
| 1:05:02 |
| know what Johnny means to a lot of us um I wouldn't |
| 1:05:08 |
| I could not have done and I couldn't do the I couldn't be who I am today without |
| 1:05:13 |
| Johnny have been there and what I would consider the darkest time of my life |
| 1:05:19 |
| um and it I didn't know how to get out of a whole lot of times and when you have somebody |
| 1:05:27 |
| like Johnny even though he is uh you know pain in the ass a lot of times |
| 1:05:33 |
| um was always there but always answer the phone would always be there and wasn't just a physical |
| 1:05:39 |
| therapist and I I'm not going to let this opportunity go by without saying |
| 1:05:46 |
| thank you and thank you for being there for me my |
| 1:05:52 |
| family and being a friend I'm not going to let this opportunity because you know you |
| 1:05:58 |
| probably don't you won't talk about it about how good you are and were as a therapist but mostly as a friend |
| 1:06:04 |
| awesome man I love it that's why I love just being able to stay in touch with you guys it was the best of times it was |
| 1:06:11 |
| the worst of times right yeah you and I just reflected last summer on man I |
| 1:06:16 |
| don't know if we could do it again but I really miss our times with with everyone we missed you at uh at Johnny's wedding |
| 1:06:22 |
| I know it sucks I know we gotta we had uh Dr Shu and I got to uh to spend a lot |
| 1:06:29 |
| of quality time together and I I a lot we laughed and I was like man these are the fun times when like none of us are |
| 1:06:36 |
| in stressful situations and like we get to like be a part of like a good thing |
| 1:06:42 |
| and we're years and years removed from trauma and it's like we get to celebrate |
| 1:06:47 |
| I was like man it was it was pretty awesome to do that and we missed you there so but but I still have it uh |
| 1:06:55 |
| you see it the flag you gave me man still one of my coolest gifts of all |
| 1:07:00 |
| time right after he recovered and redeployed and carried a flag out on his |
| 1:07:06 |
| first mission and then gifted it back to me it was it was super cool never sitting here |
| 1:07:13 |
| all right man that that was amazing Ryan happy Memorial Day brother I miss you |
| 1:07:18 |
| let's keep all reaching out for for the good things and not the bad things and |
| 1:07:23 |
| um I appreciate you doing this my man yeah man of course by the way you know I'll always do that and uh again appreciate you |
| 1:07:29 |
| foreign |
| 1:07:41 |
| [Music] |
| 1:08:09 |
| all right [Music] |
| 1:08:25 |
| [Music] |
